Winning.

So last night was a little bit of an adventure. Well, not really an adventure. Just super funny. So remember how I intern for Jen Clyde Stylist? Well we had a meeting at her house in Salt Lake last night. So I drove up there in the rain and everyone arrived at 7:30. I had only ever met Jen so we were pretty much all new to each other except for conversing on Twitter and things. So I met Angela, Ashely, and Whitney. Ang and Ash both intern for Jen as well and Whitney is a producer at ABC 4. So Jen has the cutest house ever and we were all just sitting in her living room and her sweet daughter is showing us her amazing gymnastics skills. We start talking about what we are supposed to talk about, you know, business. And then we stray off topic a few times. I think the first time we got off topic was when someone asked about Jen's green rug. Now, Jen's husband is an interior designer so she laughs and says he hates it soooo much! Then she starts telling us how she came to buy it. Her dog died (she says as she's petting her dog Willow (who is adorable by the way), "Not this dog.." oh no way Jen? Willow is still alive? Laughs) so she was super sad and went and bought this green rug. Now, even though her husband hates the rug, he let her keep it because she was so upset about her dog. Mind you, she didn't finish this story until a few hours later when she remembered she hadn't finished it at first. So you can imagine how many random topics came up in between all of this. Her moral of the green rug story; buy things when you're really upset about something because your husband will let you keep them.

So a few more topics off the subject of business included, The Bachelor, Courtney from The Bachelor, Michelle Money, how to talk to your kids about sex, inappropriate commercials, etc. So you can imagine the tears of laughter that were shed as well as the sore cheeks and abs. We'll go into some detail about some of these topics, starting with Courtney from The Bachelor. WINNING! That's how it all started. If you're not watching The Bachelor then you won't understand but let me explain. Courtney is a she-devil who is trying to "win" Ben (The Bachelor) as if he's some kind of prize. But she has a punch line that's not even her's because she stole it from Charlie Sheen. She always says, "WINNING." So horrible. No one should ever say that. Ever. Anyway we talked about her and that awful upper lip of hers and her ability to sound like a snob with every word that comes out of her mouth. ie: Ben: "We're headed to Puerto Rico!!"  Courtney: "I was just there two months ago.." Oh, we're sorry Courtney that we can't take you to places you've never been because you're this "huge model." Also she says the most oxymoron-ish thing I've ever heard, "I'm a nice person. Don't F*** with me." Pretty sure that doesn't work babe.

So next topic. We'll skip the "how to talk to your kids about sex" for reasons and go straight to inappropriate commercials. Jen is telling us about this awful commercial she saw, "And you know it had all of these sexual 'indudendos.' " Angela and I were the only ones who caught the mistake which I'm sure was just a slip of the tongue, but BOY did it set us off. Everyone else was laughing at the commercial while Ang and I were dying over 'indudendos' and no one had a clue. So great. A few more funny things happened. Like Jen telling us that she named her first cat Ghetto Superstar. And how she moved to Utah years ago but now, "I AM Utah. I am one with nature." But we'll skip over those things. Just remember that Jen says the funniest things.

So anyway...four and a half hours later we were all get together for a picture and then head out. But not before this...

I tweet: "I AM Utah. I am one with nature." Oh Jen. #ghettosuperstar
Angela then tweets to me: "Nothin like some sexual indudendos to get the night goin."
In response I laugh so hard I slide down the wall to my knees. Yeah. It was really, really late. 

Cute girls right? 

So then I'm driving from Jen's house and I'm absolutely starving so I think I'll stop at Wendy's. Well I go to McDonald's instead (not sure how that happened) but I'm on the phone and when I pull up to the drive through I say, "Hey, I gotta go I'm at McDonald's." So I acknowledged that I was at McDonald's. Then I order like I'm at Wendy's...


Me: "...And can I get a Frosty instead of a drink?" 
Guy: "A what?" 
Me: "Can I get a Frosty instead of a drink?" 
Guy: "You want a shake instead of a drink?" 
Me: "Yeah, I want a Frosty instead of a drink." 
(Why is he giving me such a hard time about wanting a Frosty? I know it's late but give me a break). 
Guy: "Okay...do you want chocolate, vanilla, or strawberry?"
(Strawberry? When did they start making a strawberry Frosty?)
Me: "Chocolate."


So I get to the window and I'm on the phone again and they give me my food. I drive away but not before I check to be sure I got everything. "AH! They didn't give me a spoon! Where is my spoon? Fine. I'll just drink it with this straw. Ew! And since when do they put whipped cream on their Frostys?" I'm angry on the phone. Then I'm driving, on the freeway at this point when I take my first sip of my "Frosty." "What?! This doesn't even taste like a Frosty!" (Yes I talk to myself in the car). Then I'm eating the fries thinking to myself that Wendy's fries are way better than McDonald's fries. Only about 30 seconds later did I finally put together that I had gone to McDonald's and they do not sell Frostys. I literally bursted out laughing every few minutes because I couldn't believe how blonde that move was. The McDonald's guy must have thought I was the dumbest girl alive. 


Then I come home to my roommates and our friends Brad and Jesse just talking about things we won't discuss here. We stayed up WAY too late. Good news is...I got to 4.9 MILLION on Temple Run. I know it's not 13 mill like everyone else is getting these days but it's amazing to me alright? 


In the words of Courtney, last night I was totally WINNING. In good and bad ways.